Diary of a Night Auditor

RSS

Now

  • Guest: Hello, I'm here to check-in for two rooms *shoves phone with an email confirmation in my face*
  • Me: Umm, okay. Let's see. It looks like your reservations are for later today
  • Guest: What do you mean? It is today and I need to check-in right now
  • Me: I'm sorry, but your check-in time is at 3pm later today. We're sold out and checkout time is at 11am and we might be able to do an early check-in but I can't guarantee that
  • Guest: Why did it let us book if we need to check-in right now?
  • Me: Because you put your arrival date as today and your confirmation tells you check-in time is at 3p, look, right here
  • Guest: What am I supposed to do? Everywhere was full, I thought I had 2 rooms for right now
  • Me: Again, I'm sorry about that, and you have 2 rooms for later tonight
  • Guest: Okay, let me talk with everyone and see what we're going to do

♪Oh joy, it’s raining outside♪
♫One of our rooms is leaking♫
♪Rainwater on their face and side♪
♫Angry guest is shrieking♫

♪”I’m sorry” I say♪
♫”This is awful and uncalled for♫
♪Let me move you right away”♪
♫Complaints are in store♫

♪New room is thankfully dry♪
♫They say “comp my room♫
♪Full price isn’t going to fly”♪
♫”Okay” I say all too soon♫

Aug 9
willcub:

Truth.  

willcub:

Truth.  

(Source: mandatoryrollercoaster)

Aug 3
When you’ve as much as you can for a guest and it still isn’t enough.

When you’ve as much as you can for a guest and it still isn’t enough.

I’m open to the idea of paying you

- (via clientsfromhell)

Government

  • Person: I need a room for tonight
  • Me: Okay, with a full hot breakfast, complimentary wifi, and a late checkout the rate for tonight is 179.95 plus tax
  • Person: I need a government rate, I'm retired military, and I ~*always*~ get the government rate
  • Me: *Looks to the fourth wall* -_-
  • Me: I'm sorry, but unfortunately tonight is a blackout night and the federal per diem isn't available, the best I'd be able to do is AAA at 174.95 plus tax
  • Person: No, I ~*~ALWAYS~*~ get the government rate
  • Me: I do apologize, but like I said it is a blackout night and besides AAA and AARP we don't have any other discounts and the whole town is sold out because of a festival
  • Person: You keep saying it's a blackout, what the hell is a blackout?
  • Me: It's a night that a hotel sets aside when it expects to be extremely busy and have limited availability. It's actually quite common
  • Person: That's fucking bullshit, so you don't want me to stay here is that what you're saying?
  • Me: *internally thinking yes* Not at all, but I have one room left and like I said the best I can do is 174.95 plus tax
  • Person: Well, you just lost a Priority Club member buddy *leaves*
  • Walk-in person waiting behind: Wow, you took that great
  • Me: Thanks, how can I help you?
  • Walk-in person waiting behind: I will take that last room

Pro Tip for Travellers #983

kohlel:

When a front desk worker says the hotel has no vacancy, stand there and sigh to yourself. This tactic usually causes more rooms to appear.

Jul 2

lizq-vs-the-kitkatuprising:

free rewards programmes =/= discounts on rooms

free rewards programmes = earning points that you an redeem for free stays (or things online, not kidding you can get electronics and bags and stuff)

Unless you have magic powers…

nightauditnonsense:

When will people learn that no matter what member status you are sold out means sold out. I am not going to evict someone at 3 am and clean the room for you.

I actually have a member arriving in a few hours (way before housekeeping even gets here) and they want to check-in ~*~early~*~. We’ll see how that goes.

Hint: We’re 100% sold out so…

NOOOOOOOOOOOOO

More sports teams in-house.

T_T